A Wine Primer Part 3: Safe Bet Wines

In my continuing effort to steer people away from Charles Shaw and into the many many higher quality wines that can be had for only a couple dollars more, I present to you today some general guidelines to buying quality inexpensive wine.

I sell wine and many many people come in asking for one specific wine. Wine is a finite thing each year. There's only so much 2005 Chardonnay made by X Winery in a given year. When it's gone, it's gone. Additionally, wine can be allocated to retailers and distributors making it impossible to get more of it once it's gone. Many customers try to seek out a wine they loved that they'd had at a restaurant or a wine they'd had wine tasting, but many many wineries only sell direct through the winery or through restaurants.

Thankfully virtually every winery has embraced the internet as a means of selling their wine and shipping costs are relatively nominal.

So what can you do if you have a wine you really really like? There's surprisingly a lot of useful information on a label that can be very helpful. Here's a step by step:

1. Make note of winemaker, though this might not be as useful as you think.
2. What's the vintage?
3. Where is it from? (This is key).
4. What are the grapes?
5. Note the price (know that the retail price will be 30%-50% less than the wine list price).

Something that the Europeans have always recognized about their wines is that WHERE it's from is inextricable from WHAT'S in it. Soil and climate is the most important consideration in a wine--for instance Sancerre and Chablis taste strikingly similar even though one's Sauvignon Blanc and one's Chardonnay. Sancerre and Chablis are virtually next each other and their terroir consists of the same white chalky soil. A Chablis is more similar to a Sancerre than to another white Burgundy from across the region in, say, Macon or Meursault.

That's more for the advanced class though.

What I'm saying is, if you have a 2004 X Winery Dry Creek Zinfandel, you'll probably like MOST 2004 Zinfandels from Dry Creek. If you enjoyed a 2005 Jumilla Monastrell from Juan Gil, you'll like a 2005 Jumilla Monastrell from Casa Castillo. Though you probably won't like 2005 Yecla Monastrell.

More advanced class stuff, but you get my point. Admittedly a talented winemaker can do glorious stuff with excellent fruit and can MAYBE make a respectable wine from mediocre fruit, but what it really comes down to is the fruit. So instead of our American fixation on brand brand brand, let's take a different approach and think about PRODUCT.

You like a hamburger. You like roast chicken. You like ravioli. Sure if you had your druthers you'd get a Whopper, but you'll get a Famous Star before you get a BK Broiler in a pinch, because you know that in the end you like a greasy fast food burger regardless of producer more than you like a greasy fast food chicken sandwich from the same producer. You see?

But money's limited and sometimes you're just stuck someplace and need some wine. So what do you do?

I present to you a list of SURE THINGS! They're like a chick with tattoos who smokes and is overweight but in that still sorta hot way (i.e. big tits and a pleasant face), she'll pretty much always say yes.

1. Shiraz from Australia. It's never great, but it's always pretty rich and tasty without being tannic.

2. White wines from Spain or Italy. Unlike most other regions' whites that rely upon oak and weird herbal grassiness, Spanish and Italian whites are brisk, crisp, and innocuous. Guaranteed not to offend.

3. Gruner Veltliner. This might set you back a bit more than other wines, especially given its local trendiness, you can still get a liter of this tasty dry Austrian white wine for less than $15.

4. Cava & Prosecco. Fuck Korbel's. If you want a cheap sparkling wine grab one of these from the value bins of Spain and Italy. Always crisp, almost always bottle conditioned, and almost always for under $10 (especially Cava). Trader Joe's has one right now for $5.99 that is pretty wickedly inoffensive.

5. California Merlot. As maligned as this grape has been lately, it really does deserve its consideration as one of the most esteemed grapes in the world. It's lush and soft, mellow, and with a few hints of earthy complexity even in lower priced examples.

6. Red wine from the south of France for under $10. For some reason France doesn't let much bad cheap wine get out, I don't know why this is, but it seems to be true. Look for stuff from the Southern Rhone, Languedoc, and Provence. Grenache from this reason is a particularly good bet. Nothing great, but tasty and versatile.

7. Queer varietals (I'm reclaiming the word!) from California. A lot of wineries are experimenting with some funky grapes these days. Sylvaner. Grenache. Carignane. Albarino. Petit Verdot. Viognier. Chenin Blanc. Muscat. These're being done by a handful of producers with some excellent results and since the wines have virtually no demand, they're almost all under $20 with many around $10 or less.

Hope that helps.